A tale of 2 parcels ...

... (apologies in advance for the crap photies, the battery was on it's very last legs and died before I could do better).
So, cat vomit was not the only thing that greeted me on my home coming this afternoon. On the front porch was a wee parcel containing the teeniest wee bottle of perfume, Flower by Kenzo (one of my favourite smells - mermaid for scale).

It took me a while, but I remembered filling in one of those on-line survey jobbies, and this was a thank you.
Then, a bit later on, Mr Brown came home. He brought inside another parcel. One of those post bags, all plastic and (reasonably) well sealed.
He plonked it in my lap. "Oooh, goodie," I thought, "wonder who's sending me a parcel?"
Well, I picked it up and my lap filled with BLOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sticky, red, and quite a bit of it. "Shit" I thought, "What the fuck" thought I. My mind raced, who on earth disliked me enough to send me something dead and bleeding in the post? Mr Brown was horrified (mostly, I believe, because some of the red stuff made it onto his beautiful ,and very expensive, white shirt).
I rushed to the bathroom and put the parcel in the sink. I cut it open.
Turns out it wasn't blood, but hibiscus juice.

My brother, OJ, and his lovely wife had sent me a late birthday pressie, including a jar of hibiscus buds in syrup. The lid had had come loose and leaked to buggery.
Bummer, still, I'm sure if we buy champagne tomorrow we'll still be able to make use of the flowers.
Also included a (very stained) card, Merlot chocolate and gingerbread bebes. Mmmmmmm, tar you 2.
EDITED TO ADD - OOh lucky they came in a cellophane bag - Love to eat them Gingerbread bebes. Gingerbread bebes what I love to eat. Bite they little heads off. Nibble on they tiny feet.
With apologies & thanks to B Kliban.