Sunday, July 18

In which Mr Brown goes too far ...

... we are a spider-friendly household.
We don't kill spiders for the sake of killing them. I water the buggers when it gets very hot and have been known to save them before cats pull all their legs off.
We like spiders. At least I thought so. Until today.
Mr Brown came rushing in from the back yard, all "quick, give me Rupert".
So I did, asking why?
"I've found a spider," was all he said.
Then he came in and he showed me the pictures.Holy fuck! Shudders of revulsion and fear tremored through me. I reverted to my most primitive monkey state and shrieked "DID YOU KILL IT?"
"Go, now, kill it, kill it, kill it, what if it bites Pingu? KILL IT."
"It won't bite Pingu and cats aren't affected by spider bites anyway". (Actually true.)Mr Brown went and checked the backyard spider identification chart we keep in the kitchen (what? Doesn't everyone?). He reported it was a male trapdoor, not a male funnelweb but that did not calm or reassure me one little bit. Something deep down in the oldest, most reactionary part of my brain just screamed KIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL.
But he wouldn't. He wouldn't let me kill it either. He practically gave him a little dish of cream and a pat on the head.I got Mr Brown to shake out my boots before I put them on. I may never go outside again! Errrrk, just look at his beady little eyes *shudder*


Zee Poodle said...

O.M.G. I kill spiders if they are 100th the size of this hairy beast. Eeeek!!

Ms Brown Mouse said...

Poodle, we mustn't kill spiders. Well, mostly not .... mostly!

Ms Brown Mouse said...

O, and hey, email me you bloggage linkie, I can't get IN!!!

Pink Granite said...

Faints dead away

Pink Granite said...

Revived by smelling salts.

"Mr Brown went and checked the backyard spider identification chart we keep in the kitchen (what? Doesn't everyone?)"

Ummm... NO!!!

Faints dead away - again

Ms Brown Mouse said...

Ops, sorry Lee, be assured, now I've calmed down, he's a nice friendly spider who will only bite if provoked and even then it's a mild, non-deadly sort of poison. Still, bloody frightening looking bugger isn't he?
You should keep a spider ID chart, so you know what not to panic over :)

Roo said...

GREAT! where am I headed in less than 4 DAYS.... OMG! Gives me an excuse to post the pics I took just 20 mins ago.... not quiet as scary ;o)

Ms Brown Mouse said...

Roo, wear boots!
I'll go look but I'm betting no wimpy UK spider can be as horrifying as ours!

e said...

I was about to say, I bet he's scary looking because he's harmless, then I read your comments. How big is it? So interesting. Heebie jeebies, but awesome. Glad you didn't kill it.

Ms Brown Mouse said...

E - he was about 2 inches across, including legs, so not that big really.
I'm glad I didn't kill him too ... now!